12 Reasons to Accept That This Article is Clickbaity as Fuck

1 – It includes this picture of a cute puppy as the featured image.

St._Bernard_puppy
Awww! I’m wasting your time!

2 – It includes some pseudo-philosophical quote about something that everyone relates to but sounds personal to you in bold mesmerising letters on a beautiful landscape background.

sea-sky-sunset-water
Wow! This article totes gets me!

3 – It includes the number of things the article lists in the title.

Title
Oooh, 3 reasons so far! Almost got clickbait bingo!

4 – Another picture of a cute puppy is featured.

The_Puppy
Shouldn’t you be doing something productive? Like working or folding socks or staring aimlessly into the distance? You know, worthwhile activities.

5 – The majority of the article is one sentence bullet points and images quickly found on Google.

arrow-156118_960_720

6 – It doesn’t really fit into any normal category so we’ve dumped it into ‘Arts & Entertainment. Because fuck you, that’s why.

FlipsideThug
At Leeds Flipside, we don’t give a fuuuuuuuck.

7 – The above popular internet culture reference, which the writer of this article still doesn’t fully understand. Isn’t ‘thug’ a negative term? Why are people upholding it as something praiseworthy?

8 – It’s clearly just been written to meet post quotas and because the writer has few ideas and/or cannot be arsed to actually write something.

64368770_7bce91daf6_o
I’ve got actual work I should be doing.

9 – Yet another teeny tiny cuddly canine.

3432756019_63038b1708_o
Seriously, why are you still reading this crap? Even the writer is embarrassed by this. Thank god for internet anonymity.

10 – All this site’s writer’s are in their early twenties. You probably don’t know that, but any site run by people who have yet to actually earn their own money for at least a few years is going to be about getting views rather than being interesting, informative, engaging, or worthwhile.

11 – As it nears the end the writer is clearly running out of ideas for this bullshit list, so here’s a picture of late comedian Rodney Dangerfield.

RodneyDangerfield1978
This was the first thing that came into my head.

12 – It ends with a picture of a cute kitten, just to mess with the feng shui of this brilliant written piece of journalism.

kitten-2
I bet your life is so much more fulfilled for finishing this article.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s